Live Blogging the RNC

9:46 - Laura's proud first female veep will be a Republican woman.

9:47 - Women, women, women...Republicans are all about women this year, huh?

9:48 - George has "enduring love" for USA. Hate for everyone else. And the other half of the USA.

9:49 - Laura's giving "straight talk" to pay homage to McCain of 2000. "Lip service" to pay homage to hubbie's policies, McCain of 2008.

9:51 - Laura's taking credit for Bono's work while stealing Obama's lines.

9:53 - GWB's duties have him in Washington for the first time in weeks because he wasn't there last time a major hurricane hit New Orleans.

9:55 - "I know what it takes to be president." Apparently includes looking over daily intelligence briefings. Although not stated, it entails ignoring them as well.

9:56 - You know he has "Pause for applause" on his prompter.

9:57 - "Angry left" - we're angry because of you, George. Some of us wanted McCain in 2000...

9:58 - Energy efficient and oil prospecting! He has it all!

9:58 - Bush says he knows about McCain's straight talking. McCain knows about Bush's back-talking.

10:00 - Dedicated three seconds to Palin. Nice endorsement, right there. Even Bush knows nothing about her.

10:00 - What the fuck? Mountains and suns? What the hell is he talking about? That's some cowboy shit, right there.

10:03 - "We leave the white house with great gratitude for your support," says the wife of the president with the lowest approval rating in history.

10:04 - I actually like Laura Bush, it's her husband I don't like.

10:05 - Reagan bio vid. I actually like Reagan, too, from a historical perspective - I just hate how Republicans are still milking form his teets.

10:08 - How'd Thompson get the pimp spot? And where's his hot-as-hell wife? She should be the VP nominee.

10:09 - Holy shit, Fred Thompson is pouring on the bleach. "Most prosperous nation?" Sarah Palin is a "breath of fresh air?"

10:11 - Washington pundits and political analysts apparently hate Palin because she's not on the talk show circuit - what the fuck?

10:12 - God, these guys are going to feel so stupid in a week from now. They really don't get the Palin situation, or really don't get that she's going to implode.

10:12 - How do you field dress a moose?

10:13 - Wait - John McCain fought in the Revolutionary War? I think I might have misheard. Or John's really fucking old.

10:14 - Holy shit - there's going to be a closing prayer?

10:16 - Apparently McCain was Maverick from Top Gun while in flight school in Pensacola.

10:17 - We'll be hearing about McCain's war experience every night. Honestly, I love these types of stories. I love hearing my family's war stories. This is what the DNC was missing, unfortunately. Makes for an entertaining evening - doesn't make for a good President, however, unless your name is George Washington. Or Teddy Roosevelt.

10:23 - "Strength, courage, humility, wisdom, courage, honor" and now with improved pandering! God, I want 2000 McCain back.

10:25 - "And now we're winning..." Crowd chanting "USA." It's like a Michael Bay version of a national convention.

10:27 - They keep showing the same hot young Republican. Who is she? Is she single? I'd convert for some of her abstinence love.

10:28 - Did Thompson just dis Obama for using a teleprompter while READING A TELEPROMPTER? We see the teleprompter, Fred! It's right there!

10:29 - "Most liberal, inexperienced nominee to ever run for president." That would be Lincoln, actually.

10:30 - Current congress is "least accomplished." I think "most vetoed" is the appropriate term.

10:30 - Liberalism is reform and change you fucking dolt.

10:34 - Fred Thompson needs to pick up a Wall Street Journal. All he has to do is read the headlines, really.

10:35 - "Continued prosperity..." Thompson just wants Law & Order to bring him back on.

10:40 - Hey, it's that guy that ran with Gore!

10:42 - I wonder if Lieberman's going to join in with Group Prayer Time.

10:42 - Lieberman's following up Thompson partisan speech with talk of crossing the aisle. And you're a fucking Independent, Joe, don't misrepresent yourself.

10:43 - Oh no, you're not fucking doing this. You are not actually pretending to be a Democrat, are you?

10:45 - Didn't you all hate this guy in 2000? You all hated McCain, too. What a difference 8 years makes.

10:47 - Lieberman: 9/11 was a "natural disaster." Lieberman associates Muslims with Tornadoes.

10:48 - Talk about Palin, Lieberman. I'd love to hear your thoughts on her.

10:49 - A Michael Moore joke? What year are we in?

10:50 - Lieberman on Obama: "Eloquence is no substitute for a record." Tits are, apparently.

10:51 - Lieberman just praised Clinton - every attendee's heads exploded.

10:51 - Oh! Palin time! "Across party lines" "She's a leader we can count on to help John shape up Washington" "I sincerely believe that the real ticket for change this year is the McCain/Palin ticket." That's all we get about Palin from Lieberman. He apparently doesn't know much about her, either.

10:53 - "Mavericks" are we still using that word? We should start using "Panthers," sounds tougher and more red-necky.

10:54 - "John McCain had the guts and the judgment to sound the alarm about the mistakes we have made in Iraq." And he plans on repeating those mistakes for years to come.

10:56 - Lieberman wants to speak "directly to democrats and independents." I'm listening. I'm "thinking of voting for John McCain," apparently.

10:57 - Wow, weakest endorsement ever. "John McCain is no ordinary candidate."

10:58 - Hah, I can't believe I voted for this guy in 2000. Fuck, man, this is a crazy-ass election. Lieberman is IMPLORING democrats to vote McCain. I can't wait to hear the democrat response. "Come together to make...John McCain our next great president."

11:01 - Donna Brazile is dissing Joe Lieberman hardcore. "On the issues he believes with Barack Obama 95% of the time."

Labels: editorial, live_blogging, politics

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