Level Sands and The Force was With Us

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

I just realized I forgot to plug Lone and Level Sands by A. David Lewis. I actually picked this up at WW Philly but didn’t read it until a month ago. I’m going to preface this by saying that it is not the best comic you can possibly read, I feel like it's more rewarding the more familiar you are with the source material, but I have a strong love for all sorts of religion, especially Judaism and Catholicism (although my tastes lean more towards historical religion) and this book was right up my alley. It’s the tale of Moses and Pharaoh but what makes it super interesting and such a great take on the text is that Pharaoh is portrayed as this man that takes his punishment from God and tries to remain a good man to his family and kingdom throughout. Such a great take on the story, I loved it, and you should read it if you have any interest in the source material.

Story time…

Following yesterday’s lining up story, I was one of the tens-of-thousands of dorks that camped out for Episode I tickets back in the day. A far cry from Celtics-Bulls tickets, I’ll give you that.

This is actually one of my favorite stories and I’m very surprised I haven’t told it yet – I actually needed to double-check and make sure. It takes place right after the first time Robin and I hung out (my version her version). I was sitting in the cafeteria with my friend Akiva when he asked me if I wanted to camp out for Star Wars tickets. I mean, why not? It was only the middle of finals’ week, what’s wrong with an all-nighter hanging out with a bunch of dorks in Jedi costumes?

We decide to do it, round up a couple of more people and pack some bags with books to study, food, and booze. We get to the movie theater and we’re the third group online, within the next four hours or so the line extends around the block.

I tried to study. Really, I did. I re-read some stuff and went over the homework. But this wasn’t a line – this was a god-damn party. Everyone was drinking, smoking weed – people making out in dark corners. Word got out that we were lining up and guys came by in cars and yelled “dorks” and got a response they probably never expected. Rocks and empty bottles of scotch and beer flying towards their car while a bunch of “dorks” bum-rushed them. They peeled out of that bitch.

It wasn’t even a Star Wars line. I’ve seen the videos – they dress in costumes and play board games and card games and stuff. We had women flashing us for shots of Jack. This was a college party down in the streets of Copley Square. We were running out of alcohol as the night progressed and had to send people to get back-up before package stores closed. And as the party grew, my need to study for the test slowly went away.

We didn’t sleep. At around 4 or 5 AM this girl from the news came down to do a story on us. She asks if anyone wants to be interviewed and I just ran up to her, ready for prime-time (or day-time, technically).

Some kid ran up to me and handed me his toy lightsaber. The newswoman smiles and starts the interview.

“How long have you been on line?”

“Like twelve hours, maybe?”

“Twelve-hours! And what motivated you to do this?”

“Oh, man, this is Star Wars, baby. This is like…my childhood, you know what I’m saying?”

“And what’s this you have here?” (motioning to my lightsaber)

“Oh man, this is the lightsaber I use when I’m fighting off the evil Jedis that try to cut in front of me on line.”

I then begin drunkenly swinging the lightsaber around, making fake lightsaber noises.

A couple of hours later I leave the line so I can take a nap before my exam. Akiva is fine with purchasing the tickets.

I get into my class, feeling like shit, and sit down to take my final. My teacher walks in, gives the exams to the TA who begins to hand them out and says:

“Good luck, everybody. And Jason, may the force be with you. You’re going to need it.”

Turns out my little clip was not just on the news that morning, but I was actually the guy they showed on the promo piece.

Promo guy: Coming up, on morning news…

Cut to me playing with the lightsaber.

Newscaster: Coming up, after the break…

Me: I’m fighting off evil Jedis.

It wasn’t my proudest moment but it’s definitely one of my favorite stories.


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