Jason Rodriguez - The Moose in the Closet: Squiddies and Molotovs

Here’s a letter I sent to a bunch of people and now I’m sharing it with you. If you can help us out, that would be awesome And, while you’re at it. Include me for best editor. Please. I entertain your asses everyday and this is how you can pay me back. I know you’re laughing, I know you like this blog. Jason Rodriguez. Editor of the year.

Hello H&B friends and creators –
Hoarse & Buggy is trying to get a little more awareness, some attention from the main-stream comics reader, and we kind of thought that the Squiddies would be a nice place to start. Every year a bunch of fans, creators and ballot box stuffers place votes in numerous comic-related categories. We’re asking you to be a ballot-stuffer this year.

Below is a list of all the categories, we were nominated for anthology of the year. In addition to WToT for anthology, we'd also like to push for Phil Hester and Nick Stakal’s “The Gallows’ Builder” for best comic short of the year (write-ins are welcomed). And on top of that, we’re looking at the nominated Sean Maher for comic reviewer of the year because he’s a huge supporter and a great guy and he promised that if he wins he'll buy us a beer. We’d like you to help make that happen, so, if you can spare a few moments, please copy and paste everything below the line and email it to votes2004@squiddies.org . We filled in the categories we were interested in and, if you wanted to, feel free to fill in the other categories with whatever creator, book, etc you fancy. Or don’t! If you’d rather just be a ballot stuffer that’s fine with us. Thanks a lot.

Jason Rodriguez

____________________________

BEST COMICS WRITER
BEST COMICS PENCILLER
BEST COMICS CARTOONIST
BEST COMICS INKER
BEST COMICS PAINTER
BEST COMICS LETTERER - Jason Hanley (Western Tales of Terror)
BEST COMICS COLORIST
BEST COMICS CREATIVE TEAM
BEST COMICS COVER ARTIST
BEST COMICS EDITOR – Jason Rodriguez (Western Tales of Terror)
BEST POLITICAL CARTOONIST
BEST COMICS SHORT STORY – “The Gallows’ Builder” by: Phil Hester and Nick Stakal (Western Tales of Terror #2)
BEST COMICS NOVELLA
BEST ORIGINAL GRAPHIC NOVEL
BEST COMICS MULTI-PART STORY
BEST COMICS ONGOING SERIES
BEST MANGA SERIES
BEST NEW COMICS SERIES
BEST COMICS LIMITED SERIES
BEST COMICS REPRINT COLLECTION
BEST COMICS ANTHOLOGY – Western Tales of Terror
BEST COMIC STRIP
BEST WEB COMIC
BEST COMICS COMPANY/IMPRINT
BEST COMICS CHARACTER
BEST COMICS CHARACTER TEAM
BEST COMICS-RELATED ADAPTATION
BEST COMICS-RELATED MERCHANDISE
BEST COMICS PUBLICATION
BEST FOCUSED COMICS WEBSITE
BEST GENERAL COMICS WEBSITE
BEST COMICS BLOG
BEST COMICS JOURNALIST
BEST COMICS REVIEWER - Sean Maher
FAVORITE RAC'ER (NON-CREATOR)
FAVORITE RAC'ER (CREATOR)

___________________________

Story time.

We were pretty destructive kids growing up. I’m talking about the pre-Junior High years, when you still have no respect for things like personal property or the law, we were pretty bad. I have plenty of stories involving firecrackers (and I’m talking the big boys, M80s, Blockbusters, Cantaloupes and Watermelon bombs), crowbars and switchblades being used to cause maximum damage to cars, windows, and oh man oh man oh man condemned buildings were our destructive playgrounds and we had plenty of those in our poor ass neighborhood.

But today, I want to really get to the heart of exactly how destructive we were and how inner city destructiveness is way different than putting a baseball bat to a mailbox.

One day we decided to make Molotov Cocktails. We were ten years old.

Now, I know what you may be thinking. Ten year olds know how to make Molotov Cocktails? No. No, we didn’t. And that was the problem.

We took a bottle and stuffed it with rocks, first. The thought was, when the cocktail exploded, the rocks will go all over the place for maximum damage; right off the bat showing that we had no idea what the fuck we were talking about.

After the rocks we added rubbing alcohol, because something had to catch fire and eventually explode, sending the rocks all over the place. This thought process made sense back then.

Now, how to get the flame into the bottle. Well, in the movies, they used rags. So we got a rag, put one end in the bottle, let the other end hang loose and tried to light it up (of course, since I engineered the cocktail, I was the lighter). Nothing happened, rag wouldn’t catch fire. We kept trying and trying and trying.

“I know,” some genius from the peanut gallery says, “let’s put rubbing alcohol on the rag.”

Sounded like a great idea at the time so that’s what we did, soaking the rag nicely in rubbing alcohol, putting the rag back in a bottle filled with alcohol and rocks and then bending over the bottle to put a match to the rag.

It was like a fucking cannon, the flame shot straight up in the air and basically singed my face. Luckily I backed away from it enough, quickly enough, so as to not catch on fire. Also, luckily this wasn’t when I was 11 years old and in my Teen Wolf phase which consisted of stupid amounts of hairspray holding my hair down.

We all booked it and left the flaming bottle of rubbing alcohol and rocks to burn out or explode, which ever came first.

So what were we going to doing with the cocktail, you ask?

We were going to throw it through the window of the spice factory, of course.

turn of the metallica, fanboy: No Categories, Vol 1: Ubiquity Compilation

Labels: mitc

Squiddies and Molotovs

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

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